Can't I just be human? I'm tired of vampires, werewolves, witches, zombies, and shapeshifters, etc.. It gets really annoying to hear about them.
Fantasies are nice and everything once in a while, but I'm sorry, hearing it everyday just means you need to get a life. I don't want to be a blood sucker and I don't want ot be a fricken hairy beast. HAHA, so I PASS.
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Would you rather be a vampire or a werewolf?
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Waiting for the Time go by...
Hey bloggers...
I don't know what to think anymore. I'm starting to believe that i'm stupid. I'm beginning to do bad in school, and like my heart is crying out loud needing someone's comfort right now.
I feel lonely.
It feels like I haven't spoken to like half of the people from carson since basically my birthday... ;(. I know I should be the one talking to them first but I don't know, I'm just waiting for a text... a call.. or a visit to come any second now. It's never what I expect though. Nothing is ever what I expect.
If i know I got a bad grade on something, I do, If I wonder if I do good on something, it turns out that i'm just plain wrong.
What the hell is that right? Well I don't know either. My life is an utter and complete miserable disaster right now. I just think I need to cry right now.
Thanks for listening<3 God bless you...
Love,
Patricianne<3
I don't know what to think anymore. I'm starting to believe that i'm stupid. I'm beginning to do bad in school, and like my heart is crying out loud needing someone's comfort right now.
I feel lonely.
It feels like I haven't spoken to like half of the people from carson since basically my birthday... ;(. I know I should be the one talking to them first but I don't know, I'm just waiting for a text... a call.. or a visit to come any second now. It's never what I expect though. Nothing is ever what I expect.
If i know I got a bad grade on something, I do, If I wonder if I do good on something, it turns out that i'm just plain wrong.
What the hell is that right? Well I don't know either. My life is an utter and complete miserable disaster right now. I just think I need to cry right now.
Thanks for listening<3 God bless you...
Love,
Patricianne<3
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Unexpected Turn Around.
Hey blogspot...
Yeah, I know I haven't blogged in a while and you know what, it hurts me. I'm affected by all this crap and well I don't know another way to actually try to vent or get some help but by only writing you.
Oh did I tell you? I moved like 9 months ago to Walnut, California. Shocker isn't it? This was one of the places I lived at before being at Carson, Cali. Really I don't even know why my parents wanted us to move here to this boring, too hot, and Asian smart ass place. I already know they're struggling and well that gives off another affect on me because well I can't do the things I used to do back at Carson. Like seriously I haven't seen some people since JANUARY! You know how long that is and like I fucking miss them!
My heart hurts so much from bottling everything up and hiding my emotions from both my family and new friends. These people here at walnut are nice and everything, but -- how should I say this?-- They're not like my best friends / 2ND family back at Carson. They don't know what to do with the emotional, outgoing, crazy, weird me. Of course they're going to figure it out somehow, and truth be told, here at walnut, I don't think I'll change my personality at all since there really isn't anything to change. Really most of the people here are all Asian, and like barely any Multi-cultural people like Carson. (which was mostly Filipinos HA HA.)
Another thing is that if I didn't move here, I wouldn't have met some other great people. I was quite judgemental at first, but who was I to kid? Come on I was the freaking new kid again. You think I like that? Well no. I was lonely at the first few days, until I met some really nice new girls, then some guys, then people at confirmation, at a church called St.Lorenzo. Nice church. Kind of reminds me of St. Philomena back at my only love and wanted hometown, Carson. added plus is that St.Philomena is chill with St.Lorenzo, We all know one another! Bad side is, Walnut doesn't have that many cute guys.... It's because this is the 'SMART ASIAN PLACE!'
HA HA, well I miss being one of the tall people back at Carson, but now I'm one of the short people here cause wow, You won't expect this, but most of the Asians here are freaking tall! HA HA crazy huh?! It seems like my mood is lighting up for now...
BTW... I wish I can find a way to meet everyone back at Carson, I miss my best friends, hanging out with them, playing / fooling around with them, and just being more of myself. More happy and less uptight.
Oh school has started already, on August 23rd. -_______-. weird huh. I'm not used to this but I'm adjusting. I feel like the only person that I've been keeping in touch with is Chrislyn, then Katerlene, Kiana, Kate, Andrei, and sometimes Kristine. I miss them but there are way more people to even text. Don't want my phone to die on me you know?
I remember on the first day of school, during lunch, I called Kate and them, and wow, boy did that make me happy. Hearing their voices and sensing their joy of talking to me was the greatest feeling ever. All in all, It feels good to be missed by a lot of people who love me, like a sister, daughter, cousin, friend, BFF, etc... I always thought of myself being not missed you know? People actually being relived that I left. I still feel that way now. Like everyone is having fun without me going out to places, celebrating their birthdays and everything. Makes me want to bawl out and want to commit suicide... I never really was one to break down, I'm an Aries, I'm stubborn. Even though I'm an Aries, I'm still a girl who has needs and wants, is sensitive, may laugh and cry at your words, yet has a heart that is big enough to love you for whoever you are.
*sigh* I really wish I had someone to talk to right now and well tell them what I'm feeling right now..
I think this is enough for you to hear for today. Still got to wake up early. Well thanks Blog spot<3 You're a great listener. You'll be hearing from me soon:)
Love forever,
Patricia Camacho...
Yeah, I know I haven't blogged in a while and you know what, it hurts me. I'm affected by all this crap and well I don't know another way to actually try to vent or get some help but by only writing you.
Oh did I tell you? I moved like 9 months ago to Walnut, California. Shocker isn't it? This was one of the places I lived at before being at Carson, Cali. Really I don't even know why my parents wanted us to move here to this boring, too hot, and Asian smart ass place. I already know they're struggling and well that gives off another affect on me because well I can't do the things I used to do back at Carson. Like seriously I haven't seen some people since JANUARY! You know how long that is and like I fucking miss them!
My heart hurts so much from bottling everything up and hiding my emotions from both my family and new friends. These people here at walnut are nice and everything, but -- how should I say this?-- They're not like my best friends / 2ND family back at Carson. They don't know what to do with the emotional, outgoing, crazy, weird me. Of course they're going to figure it out somehow, and truth be told, here at walnut, I don't think I'll change my personality at all since there really isn't anything to change. Really most of the people here are all Asian, and like barely any Multi-cultural people like Carson. (which was mostly Filipinos HA HA.)
Another thing is that if I didn't move here, I wouldn't have met some other great people. I was quite judgemental at first, but who was I to kid? Come on I was the freaking new kid again. You think I like that? Well no. I was lonely at the first few days, until I met some really nice new girls, then some guys, then people at confirmation, at a church called St.Lorenzo. Nice church. Kind of reminds me of St. Philomena back at my only love and wanted hometown, Carson. added plus is that St.Philomena is chill with St.Lorenzo, We all know one another! Bad side is, Walnut doesn't have that many cute guys.... It's because this is the 'SMART ASIAN PLACE!'
HA HA, well I miss being one of the tall people back at Carson, but now I'm one of the short people here cause wow, You won't expect this, but most of the Asians here are freaking tall! HA HA crazy huh?! It seems like my mood is lighting up for now...
BTW... I wish I can find a way to meet everyone back at Carson, I miss my best friends, hanging out with them, playing / fooling around with them, and just being more of myself. More happy and less uptight.
Oh school has started already, on August 23rd. -_______-. weird huh. I'm not used to this but I'm adjusting. I feel like the only person that I've been keeping in touch with is Chrislyn, then Katerlene, Kiana, Kate, Andrei, and sometimes Kristine. I miss them but there are way more people to even text. Don't want my phone to die on me you know?
I remember on the first day of school, during lunch, I called Kate and them, and wow, boy did that make me happy. Hearing their voices and sensing their joy of talking to me was the greatest feeling ever. All in all, It feels good to be missed by a lot of people who love me, like a sister, daughter, cousin, friend, BFF, etc... I always thought of myself being not missed you know? People actually being relived that I left. I still feel that way now. Like everyone is having fun without me going out to places, celebrating their birthdays and everything. Makes me want to bawl out and want to commit suicide... I never really was one to break down, I'm an Aries, I'm stubborn. Even though I'm an Aries, I'm still a girl who has needs and wants, is sensitive, may laugh and cry at your words, yet has a heart that is big enough to love you for whoever you are.
*sigh* I really wish I had someone to talk to right now and well tell them what I'm feeling right now..
I think this is enough for you to hear for today. Still got to wake up early. Well thanks Blog spot<3 You're a great listener. You'll be hearing from me soon:)
Love forever,
Patricia Camacho...
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